It’s been a freakin YEAR since I’ve had Leo! I can’t believe it … but I remember his birth and his first few weeks at home like it was yesterday! And as I sit here and think back to those precious first few weeks I remembered a few things I learned during that time that I’ve actually meant to share with you for a while and have finally found the time to sit down and write this … strange … for a new mom … right?? What’s spare time?? LOL!!! Today I wanted to share with you, 10 rules for visiting a new parent! I’m sure there are MANY of you out there who will feel the same way with some of the things I’m going to say below and some of you may feel differently but keep in mind, this is just from MY personal experience!
While I didn’t want to ever feel ungrateful for people wanting to reach out and pop by for visits to meet little Leo at times I really felt overwhelmed by it all. There were phone calls and texts and social media messages and people popping in and staying for a little longer than I wanted all while I was trying to get accustomed to our new life! Honestly, I ONLY wanted that first week to ten days to just be with Leo!
So for the new or new-to-be parents out there, I get it … and if I were to write the rules to visiting a new parent, here’s what I would say!
1. Wait until the timing is right: Unless you’re an immediate family member or a best friend I would suggest waiting about 2 weeks to a month before you stop in to see the new family! Unless, of course, they have reached out to you and invited you over!! I know that seems like a long time to wait but trust me, they have enough on their plates for the first few weeks!!
2. Know when to leave: I say to keep your visit under an hour … 30 minutes is probably a perfect rule of thumb to make sure you don’t overstay your welcome!! Unless they BEG you to stay!!
3. Keep your words of wisdom to yourself: You have to remember that this is a new experience for them … don’t overwhelm them by comparing birth stories or dishing out tons of advice on the do’s and don’t of parenting … if they want advice, they’ll probably google it. LOL.
4. Bring a little something to help out mama: Bring a little gift for the new parents such as some coffee, homemade almond cream, pre-made meals, etc. Trust me, they’ll use it and appreciate it. Need some fun ideas?? Check out my recent post on Hostess gifts, these ideas would be perfect in this situation too!!
5. Help out without asking: Maybe mama hasn’t showered in a few days, or brushed her teeth … or shaved her legs (so maybe you should get her an appointment at Clear Image of Fort Worth so she doesn’t have to worry about her legs anymore) … offer to watch the little one while she takes some much needed time for herself even if it’s just for 15 minutes! Every new mama deserves a good soak in the tub with some pretty bath salts!
6. Don’t swoop in and grab the baby: I think it’s always better to wait and see if they ask if you would like to hold the baby before you just get right up close and personal … remember this is a protective new mother you’re dealing with! LOL!!
7. Hold off on social media (unless it’s ok!): Personally, I LOVE social media (obviously) but a lot of people like to keep moments such as these private so I wouldn’t go flooding Instagram with photos of the new babe and parents unless they are okay with it!
8. Ease up on the texts and phone calls: Because mama is sort of … busy. She’ll get back to you when she has time … in about 18 years. LOL!!!
9. If you have a cold or the flu, steer clear: This one is self-explanatory, don’t spread your germs!
10. Compliment mama: She’s been through a lot and she’s tired … and she probably wants a big glass of wine and for her vagina to stop hurting … so just be a good friend and tell her how beautiful she is. She deserves it. LOL.
What do you think?? Share some of your rules and thoughts below!!